Dualities

As he walked down that brightly lit corridor of the mall, His thoughts ventured a few years back in time. Of what was a terrible time to face then Now fitted perfectly into the bigger picture. The answers he had spent years chasing Stood right there in front of his eyes. That beautiful woman and the bespectacled, little girl, trying on outfits at a store a few yards away from him. 

His own little home in the big empty world

He looked, and silently smiled in gratitude

"Hey mister!"

The voice broke his trance. As he turned around, already apologetic for a probable mistaken step, he saw her. Unrecognisable at first but the familiarity about those eyes was unsettling. It wasn't more than a couple seconds that the name flashed in bol in his head. It was her.

"Uh Hi, how have you been?" He blurted with difficulty and a pale face. 

"Very well, you tell me." The smile was back. "Its been long." She continued. 

The face he saw now was quite different from what he had known all these years. The "then" straight hair had now been done up in a casual bun with a tiny speck of vermillion at the top center of the forehead. A pair of spectacles were a new addition reaffirming the workaholic that she was. The red and beige bangles on her arms spoke of a recent marriage. She had lost weight, he noticed. Clad in a black patiala suit with a hint of make up, it was in sharp contrast against the shirts and jeans he remembered her in. He silently looked at her face, her lips moving as she spoke. Yes she looked elegant. She turned her face away to avoid "that" look. He knew. 

But What he noted most prominently, no span of years could take away from her, the twinkle in her eyes. The famous twinkle. 

"Long indeed" He replied almost nervously, "So when did this happen?" He continued to ask. 

"Ohh well I met Akshay about four years ago, we married about an year back"

"Thats nice to know, I wish you the best in life" 

"Same here"

"So are you here with him?"

"Oh no! Just me, regular shopping"

They had never had many words to exchange. A comforting yet awkward silence started to take over. It was broken by the sound of the little girl calling out to him, "Daddy!!" She ran to him, opening her arms as she neared. He held open his arms and lifted her into his arms!! 

"Hi baby" his face lit up like never before. 

Realising the presence of the woman in front of him, he introduced the little girl to the lady.  "This is Nishtha,

Nishtha, say hello to aunty!"

The lady chuckled with a moist eye

"Hi Nishtha, Nice to meet you" she smiled adoringly

The little girl grinned in reply.

"I should probably get going, It felt nice meeting you. Take care"

"Yeah, you take care too"

***

'The idiot had still managed to keep me close to himself' She thought to herself As she walked away from him..

***

"Who was that lady Daddy?"

He closed his eyes and gave his 4 year old daughter a loving peck on the cheek.

"Just a friend baby"

The Girl In The Metro

In those thighs so round as melons

Inviting;

In the bosom full like the mangoes in spring

I could rest my heart to 

peaceful sleep

Her arms could hold me tight enough

The nails digging into my back

While we spent ourselves till no more

In the face chubby as a newborn spake of innocence

And in those eyes, silent, seducing

I found my woman of beauty

Aafreen

As the veil was lifted

And the eye-lids raised

A manifestation of the heavens above

stood before him

So intricately crafted by the One himself

He shuddered to face such immortal beauty

As if the One himself, faced him from those eyes

No lips did move

No eyes did blink

Yet he struggled

Struggled against the shots of silent questions

Struggled for answers never sought

The eyes that looked up to its Creator in prayer

The eyes that looked down to the earth as they blushed

Those eyes that inspire poetry

Those eyes that render wordsmiths speechless

As those eyes continued to look through him

Those big round eyes on the silent face

He felt them penetrate

Penetrate every hidden secret in his head

Every muffled scream in his throat

Every curbed pain in his heart

And all he could, but stand

As those eyes just sat there silently

Probing him, passively

While he confided, like a lamb

He gazed into those pools of black

Deep, solemn and tranquil, 

the new moon night

Outlined in black with kohl

Like a meticulous painting

He stood there

Shivered

Struggled

Admiring the beauty that faced him

Wondering if He was a painter, 

or a poet

And no more than a word escaped his lips

Aafreen

Memories on Sand

She took a bite of her burger and continued gazing at the table accross her. The little girl with frizzy hair sat on the table itself while the boy was seated on the chair, none of whom looked any older than three. The girl sat clueless, staring out from those big round eyes, while a young man wiped the ketchup off the her lips and hands with some tissues. Ms. Frizzy Hair, however was sure this man in front of her would never leave her side.

Looking at the little girl, she lost herself in a maze of thoughts. Her mind drifted off to an old man who had tended to her in exactly the same way while she held out her face and hands for him to clean. 

The man, who was her hero, and to whom she was the darling baby, his warrior princess. 

The man, whose tummy was her favorite bed 

He who believed in her when no one did

He who drank from her tiny tea sets only to share her excitement

The man, she knew, would stand by her no matter what befell her

The man who led her by her tiny hands wrapped around his finger, and raised her to fight the world

The man for whom she never grew up ever since he held her in his own two palms. 

The man who loved her like no one could, cherished her and took pride in her, no matter what. 

The man, who lived only to see her little girl smile, and cackle.

The man who will always be the only hero she ever had

A single drop of water escaped her eyes

I miss you dad..

She said to herself

Farewell

I look into your eyes

You who sit here in anticipation

The big dark eyes

Those, i've come to love, over time

The gleam is back in your eyes

The chirp, in your voice

Things I longed to see, longed to hear

Things i asked for you, everytime i prayed

However transitory..

But today

I have nothing to offer but superficial silence

Observing you, fluttering around

Smiling, after what seems to be eternity

As i hold myself from breaking it to you

Waiting for the right moment

There shall be none, i realise

In what went from disgust to inexplicable love

I found you, the extension of myself

Some five hundred miles past home

A book of fables, myths, mysteries 

Slyly disguised behind concrete professionalism

Waiting to lure me into a world i always knew, i belonged to

Your world

The world of chivalry, humility, beauty

Your wait has been tough Your journey, painful

I missed you no less, you've always known

And here i stand

At another cruel bend in the road

Waiting for my chance to say

I depart, never to return..

In the flow of things I blurt it out..

You have only one thing to ask

Where?

Some place too far to come back

Take care

The smile is transitory, yet warm

I have nothing to add

No apologies, no answers

I get up and turn around

Battling the pain, battling the guilt

As i walk away thinking

You should've been in my life, a bit longer

Almost Euphoric

And it rained

Rained like it never had before

Rained like it never will again

As he sat in his balcony

In his cosy lil small town

Looking out into nothing

This was it, his town, his very moment

The chirpings of the swallows flying home

Had failed to romance him today

The chill in the breeze, made him shiver

But he stayed

Waiting for the moment to rid him of the pain

The showers intensified unannounced

But nothing changed

As he sat there

Recalling all that he had lost

Reminiscing the women he had loved

Unstoppably, uncontrollably, irrevocably

A torrential downpour

The woman who taught him to smile

And the one who taught him the beauty of tears wept in love

She, to whom he meant the world

And she to whom he meant nothing at all

She, who taught him what it meant to be loved

And she who taught him eternal pain and longing

The woman who might have fought for him

And the woman he wanted to fight the world for

And years later

All he sat today with, was empty hands

Empty yet painful life

A few smiles, umpteen emotions

Countless tears

Pondering over love he had lost

Braving the chill on his bare flesh

The grey twilight turned deeper

The amber street lights made the raindrops gleam

The rain continued unabated

The downpour of emotions went unceased

Breeze after breeze

The chill reminded him 

How cold the world had really turned

Not that it had been any different

But he had allowed himself some happy illusions

Homeless

How different are you from these homeless of delhi

I ask myself

They who roam about the roads all alone

So do you

With nothing on their body but for tattered rags

While you wear shamelessly, your tattered ego

Smoking the cheapest filth they happen to get

Quite like you, getting high on whatever grains of love drop your way

Intoxication, their only escape from the harsh reality

So be it with you

Alienated, disowned by the world they belong to

I still dont see a difference

Begging for alms at the crack of dawn

Gathering what the rich discard

As You with the bowls of your eyes loiter begging for her sight

How different really? 

I ask myself

No, not a lot